How to mess with the brain of a Dyslexic Girl…

I have been crazy busy with life recently. Between full time school, I also work part-time, hence the lack of posts recently. But here is a quick story. My father is an amazing man; I love him so much and am very lucky to have him as my father. That being said he is still my papa and has always enjoyed getting the last laugh.  Here would be such a story.

A while ago my father and I were taking a stroll in the park and came across a woman with a fairly ugly little white dog. The dogs face was smooched in, his eyes were crossed, he had what looked like skid marks on his white fur and look the result of some serious inbreeding. We chatted with the lady and like with an ugly baby told her how cute the dog was.
She told us her dog was a “Lhasa Apso and they were the best most prettiest dogs ever!”

As we walked away my father said to me “Lhasa Apso… that dog look more like a Lapsed Asshole!”  

This followed by a good laugh.

One week later, my mother and I were taking a walk and we came across, a much cuter version of the dog from the pervious week. With the confidence a girl who is not only dyslexic but lacks any form of a verbal filter I stated loudly…

“What a cute Ruptured Anus!”

My mother reaction was equally as spectacular as my statement. It took me an entire 2 second to figure out what I had just said. Somewhere deep in my Dyslexic mind I had gotten Ruptured Anus from Lhasa Apso and I had my father to thank for crossing those wires.

Returning from our walk I explained to my mother about the ugly Lhasa Apso from the week before which my father had called an Lapsed Asshole and how really anyone could have gotten confused and thought the dogs breed was that of a Ruptured Anus.

My father thought the entire things was hilarious and to this date is one of his proud moments as a parent.

So here are some deep parting words from a Dyslexic Girl!

“If life gives you Melons you may be Dyslexic!”